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The Woman Without a Credit Card. A story.
What a dream it had been, this creditless journey into
the realms of bankruptcy and no income, no visaŽ, no cards
at all. It all started when she went to sleep after eating
a pizza that his friend loaned her the money for because
she did not have cash on hand and the bank was closed. It
had been an embarrassing situation so she fell asleep quickly
to drown his money problems in sweet sleep. she dreamed that
she was in a desert of blue sand. She felt strange there.
She felt unwelcome. There were VisaŽ cards sticking out of the
sand, and MasterCards too, but all were expired or had a
credit limit that was used up. She then saw the Doctor really
quick and got a sex change.They all had his name as if
he had applied for them all. Then it started raining shreds
of paper made up of rejection slips, slips saying his credit
was denied, not approved, and notices from his credit reports
of all the rejections were there. But he knew there was hope
ahead, sort of a feeling that he would be able to get an
unsecured credit card . In fact there were signs that would
pop up that read... unsecured card ahead 10 miles ... get
an unsecured credit card easy. Low interest credit ahead 20 miles,
and even a sign saying guaranteed approval 15 miles ahead.
So his hopes were up that he could get out of this finacial,
low income desert. But also on the horizon were credit report
monsters like giant Tyranasauruses mumbling things about
turned down, credit problems, insufficient credit history,
no credit history. But a bird flew overhead saying in a
clear voice do not heed these monsters, you can be approved
for a VisaŽ card or a MasterCardŽ my friend, just keep walking
and you will see. So he keep walking, passing the sea of red ink,
passing the land of credit denied, and the hills of financial
difficulty. Also there were the tar pits in the land of security
deposit required. Oh just to get a credit card. How he wanted
a real credit card. When the sand turned green he figured maybe
he was just dreaming, or maybe it was a sign that a go sign was
ahead. Then he came upon a place. The land of many vending
machines. And he was very hungry. But all of them required a
credit card, they took VisaŽ, MastercardŽ, and DiscoverŽ. But
he
had no credit card so he journeyed on, hoping to be approved,
hoping to find an application, or a computer with online
applications for instant approval, perhaps because he was as
student someone would approve him. Oh just to have a chance to
establish a credit history , he would use his new credit card
wisesly and make his payments on time to avoid fees. He kept
walking on. Again the sign appeared saying you can be approved
for a credit card if you meet our easy requirements. Now he
began to grow thirsty. Boy, wouldn't a nice lemonade feel great
now? Oh, and a burger and fries too! He remembered the days
of his youth when he would drink lemonade and eat chocolate.
Again, another wonder in the sky.. the words scrolling by ..
credit, unsecured credit cards, easy approval, guaranteed 50
miles ahead. Then cellophane flowers of yellow and green...
wait, thats another dream! Then, as if this was not difficult
enough, a man who looked like Rodney Dangerfield appeared
saying, " I don't get no credit ". Then water rushed
into
the desert and he had to make a boat out of credit cards by
taping them together with the glue from application forms.
When his credit card boat was finished he sailed toward
the south towards the land of online application where he
hoped he could find credit at last. Maybe he could get a loan
and put the money into a secured card ... noooo bad idea
he thought. Maybe I can do a search on unsecured credit cards
and locate something, someone who will approve me, maybe there
is a bank out there that deals with high credit risks and
issues real VisaŽ or Mastercards to poor fools like me who
sail in plastic ships over blue sand in search of plastic that
awakes from terrible credit dreams such as this.
Oh just to get a credit card. How he wanted a real credit card.
There were VisaŽ cards sticking out of the
sand, and MasterCards too, but all were expired or had a
credit limit that was used up.
Again the sign appeared saying you can be approved
for a credit card if you meet our easy requirements.
Oh just to get a credit card. How he wanted
a real credit card. As he wondered again what course to
take he could hear the theme of the Andy Griffith show in
the backround. He began to whistle too. He remembered all
the places he had been... the sea of red ink,
passing the land of credit denied, and the hills of financial
difficulty. Also there were the tar pits in the land of security
deposit required. And the VisaŽ cards sticking out of the
sand, and MasterCards too, but all were expired or had a
credit limit that was used up. Again the sign appeared
saying you can be approved for a credit card if you meet
our easy requirements. Suddenly the dream changed and there
was a city with no requirements for any credit card at all,
everything was free, no VisaŽ, no MastercardŽ, no credit card
needed at all. Food was free, Money was free, but then he
woke up and was in the other dream again, the bad one.
Oh just to get a credit card. How he wanted
a real credit card. Then he saw a sign which read.
Click to Apply! And he was dreaming no more.
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